Here We Sit. . .

  Drinking coffee. . . on our "futon". Josh & I came home last night so we could take care of some stuff that needed taking care of. Seems like pumpkin season is arriving, which is hugely exciting. We just talked to Josh's sister & her & her hubby were just up visiting the little ladies, and it was their bath time. I smell Johnson & Johnson just thinking about it:) They are too tiny to be able to use that yet, I think their bath consists of sterile water and sponges. We go back tomorrow to hang out with them some more.

  Also, Josh & I were talking yesterday about how good everyone has been to us. It's been hard to thank everyone and keep in contact. . . so I hope you all know how much we appreciate everything, and how much it has helped.

  That is all for today, nothing new and exciting :) So goodnite & sleep tyt

A Quick Peek

   . . . .  @ the little ladies. We finally got some pics. It seems like I always forget when I'm in there to take pictures. We were there most of the day and then we drove home to take care of some things here that need doing. . . & sleep in our own bed:)

Here is Lizzy. . . She is cool as a cucumber. The nurse this morning had put a yellow bow in her hair, which made mama awfully happy. . . even the bear has a bow. I'm turning into a fru-fru girl I'm afraid. The big white thing on her arm is a "paddle" so that her arm doesn't bend because of the I.V. . .  I CAN NOT wait to take all of that stuff off of the little child:) The contraption on her face is the ventilator, and the little things on her chest are just different monitors. . .  so they always know what's going on inside. Hello World from Lizzy :)

. . and here is Olly. . .She has also discovered her bear. When we got there this morning & found her like this, we were delighted. Don't you love the little hands? I'm not sure which I like better. . . the feet or the hands. She has a feeding tube in her mouth and the thing around her face is a nasal canula. . . .it's not as strong as a ventilator. Some nurses tuck them in tight, so they are kinda like when they're inside. Other wise they just flail their little limbs around. . .she has also realized that she loves a passifier. It's the cutest thing, & funny because it's as big as her face:) So. . . Hello World from Olly :)

Sometimes. . .

   I just stand in the shower & cry. I just can't imagine that God has given us these two tiny little girls. They are so perfect to me. We had a lovely day today, probably one of the best days ever, because you see. . . we got to hold both Olly and Lizzy, and kiss their tiny little fury heads. Usually we would have done that for the first time 2 weeks ago, but they are minature humans. Olly arrived at Children's Mercy yesterday by plane, so now both of the girls have gotten an official ride in an airplane. She did great, the transport team said she appeared to be very opinionated. Can't imagine where she got that from. Now they are side by side. . . closer than in different hospitals. . . but not as close as they once were. I secretly tell myself that they know that they are close now, but I'm not too sure that they do. Between Josh & I we are going to wear a cattle path between their little incubators. You go to one and then realize you have another one so you go back to that one, and on and on it goes. A vicious circle really. I'm just delighted that we have two. For sure when we kept being told we would only have one, & now we have had both of them for over 2 weeks. It makes my heart happy. . . & I think it's been a miracle.

   Speaking of miracles. . . . .  I have been debating in my head whether or not I should tell my story, and I guess I've decided that I can. So to all who struggle and wonder if there is a God, let me assure you that there is. Never have I felt him so close. The night after they were born, I couldn't sleep, all I could think of was them, and I was terrified our little Lizzy girl wouldn't make it. So I prayed and cried all night. Close to morning it came to me that I should go out to the hospital court yard & walk through it and look at the flowers. . .
 ( Every time that Josh came to see me while I was in the hospital, he would take me to the court yard so I could get outside. In there were hundreds of hydrangeas, some were dead, and others just always stayed green, and never would they bloom. It always seemed so dis-heartening to me. )
   . . . . and that if I would find just one blooming, Lizzy would make it. It scared me to death. Faith has never been one of my strong points, & I couldn't make myself go out there & look. So four days later, just after they had told me that I would be released, I asked Josh to wheel me through there. Aways in, I couldn't see any blooms, and I felt sick. I hadn't told him why we were there so we kept on walking. . . . and then out of the corner of my eye was one perfect little hydrangea with a blossom that was white as snow. It was a smaller plant, made for a smaller than usual little girl & in my heart of hearts, I knew that God had put that bloom there for our little girl. She's made it. He didn't promise me how long, but that she would make it. I don't know what the future holds, but for today we are thankful, & our hearts are full.

The Two Little Angels. . .

 . . . are here. Of course I think they are perfect. Don't we all think our children are perfect? So much has happened since my last "blog" that I'm not sure where to start. One hour after I posted the last one, I decided to take a shower, and after that shower our whole world changed, and we didn't have to make any decision at all. God made it for us. At 11:00 P.M. both of the girl's heartrates started decelling, & I knew something was wrong. They hadn't ever went that low and stayed low for that long of a period of time. So Josh kept running out in the hall, (thank goodness he was still there, my worst fear was that he would be in Tim-buk-tu) & the nurse kept coming in and making calls and going back out. . .finally Dr. Grennan ( a good looking blond headed woman, with the coolest hat in the world) came in and asked if I was ok with her calling Dr. Farley. We knew if we called him, he would say deliver. So deliver it was. Aren't epiderals the epitome of a good time?  Josh was dressed in blue, & I have no idea what I was wearing. There were enough people in there to have a Thanksgiving dinner. It was nuts.

  At 12:38 Olivia Deane was born and at 12:39 Elizabeth Deane was close on her tail. . . I had never seen such cute tiny humans in the same room in my life.

  I could ramble for the next couple of pages, but I'm sure most of you have heard it at some time. Olly is still at Wesley & Lizzy is at Children's Mercy in Kansas City. I didn't realize right away that this hospital was in Missouri, so now we have a baby in Kansas and a baby in Missouri. Kind of a crazy feeling. They are doing good. It's hard for us to believe that we have two babies. From the beginning we have heard so much bad news & now we have them both. We still have a long road to travel, but we've been blessed with them for almost a week now. Lizzy has quite a few surgeries in her future, bless her heart, I wish I could have them for her :( but she is in God's hands. He's been with her & her sis this whole time. These hospitals are fantastic. . . the nurses are amazing, which makes it easier to leave them. I don't know which is my favorite, I think they even out in the long run. Children's Mercy is only children, so everything is little fish, or bright animals, or pink castle elevators, or pictures that other children have colored, & even the parking garage is labeled yellow submarine, red rocket, or blue balloon, or something like that. It's pretty cheerful.

  Today we are to have a meeting with the surgeon's about our little Lizzy, and then we will probably go back to see Olly. So pray for our little ladies. . . I want to thank each and everyone of you. Everyone has been amazing in so many ways. Josh & I feel unworthy of it all. We hope you are blessed and someday you can recieve what you have given. Love to you all. . . & more later :) J & S & Olly & Lizzy. . .

Tough Decisions

   Yesterday @ 9 o'clock P.M. central time. . .we were shipped out of our home away from home, back down to labor & delivery. . . They thought the monitoring "strip" looked a little questionable AGAIN . . .so off we went. It is now 8:55 P.M. (central time . . .lol) the next dy & we are still in L & D wearing the beautimus gowns this place so generously gives you. Along with the leggings that pump air. I have become quite a fashion statement. The girls have done pretty well, all except for a 60 second decel this morning @ 5:15, that has the doctor concerned. . . and a few variables ( whoever heard of that word before? ) where the heart rate goes down & back up in a second or so.
  Farley stopped by here this evening, & after a long mind stretching conversation, he told us that he believes we need to deliver these little babies @ 28 weeks. Josh & I don't know how to feel. It's such a tough decision, we don't want to do something we regret, because ultimately they tell us it's our decision, after they tell us all the medical facts, that is. He says nowadays 28 weekers do pretty well in the big world. . . & he seems positive that if we continue to borrow time, we won't have as good of an outcome as if they were safely out. So what to do? The plan as of now is to deliver them on thursday, which is 28 weeks & 1 day. We know that these babies were created by our master planner, and that they are in his hands, & that no matter what happens, he already knows the outcome. So we pray & hope for the best, as we know that all of you are doing the same thing for them, which makes us feel much more secure. So pray that we do the right thing for these little girls:) It feels as though they are everybodies babies because so many of you are supporting us & praying for them. That is the update as of September 12, 2011 :) Thanks to you all & have a sleep filled night. . . J & S & lil ladies.

Day of Monitoring

   What did we do today? We monitored. From 7:55 a.m until a little before 8 p.m. Baby A decided to start going up and down so we were on the monitor here on the 4th floor until about 2:30 then off to labor & delivery for the rest of the time. These girls are going to make me gray before I physically see them. I don't see how all these mom's have survived. So I will tell all of you that have children, you have my utmost respect & admiration:) And let me take a moment to whine & complain. Who in the world invented hospital gowns? Seriously, there is nothing attractive or comfortable about those things. Not a huge fan of my back side hanging out in the big world. Oh well they say put it on, & I put it on. Once we went downstairs they decided to start behaving a little better. They ordered a sonogram to be done, the usual cord dopplars on both & then see how much they've grown. 2 weeks ago at Farley's office, "A" was 2 lbs. & 3 oz. and "B" was 1 lb. 4 oz. . . When she measured them this evening "A" was 2 lbs. 14 oz. and "B" was 2 lbs. 8 oz. . .  I was delighted to hear they had grown so much. I didn't think they would have. Also "B" is not as far behind her as she was, she must have started a gaining weight competition, and I'm perfectly ok with that:) "B" kicks the monitor all day long, she is one case of a child, her kicks are so ferocious, she usually knocks her sister off as well as herself. The nurses spend all of their time chasing her around. Not sure where you can go in a belly. . .

   That pretty much sums up our day, we got back to the room, I stood in the shower for a really long time, it was amazing. Josh is going to stay up here with me tonite. . . we are like an old married couple, each in our own twin bed:)

    You all have a good weekend. . . .

27 Weeks

   Well. . . . I failed to "type" in my blog yesterday. I usually fire away at it right before bed, but I was so tired there was no finger typing activity going to go on last night. Yesterday we hit the 27 week mark. So every week we pass is a huge relief in our life:) The girls behaved most of the day until this evening they decided that once the monitor was on they would try to give us a heart attack. I usually freak out when I see those numbers going where they shouldn't, but they just had me stay on an extra 30 minutes. After review, the Doc said they looked okay. So once again I will try to put my little fears in a box. It's hard to remember that God is in control & whatever's suppose to happen will happen. Silly little ladies:) They were chuckling down in sono yesterday again because of their hair. . . She said to me, "look at that little thing poking out to the side, I believe it's a curl" I thought to myself, curl shmurl.

  For supper Josh & me decided to have a romantic setting, we put 2 tray tables together to eat our "feast" which was a hospital tray with what was supposedly honey glazed chicken, a BLT from the deli, and then some home made tater tot casserole from one of my friends who made us some "real" food.  When the nurse popped in, she asked how our date was. I'm sure they think I've fell out of my tree. Perhaps I have:)

Well I think that concludes my speech for the day. . . You all have a good day tomorrow :)

The Perks of Baking My Mo-Mo's

   Here I am eating crackers ( from Kim & Tom & their adorable family ) & drinking a suicide . . that's what the nurses call my drink that I now have to have every night before bed. It is cranberry & apple juice mixed. You may think that's funny and not very creative, but keep in mind I do not have many resources. As I sit in my bed that makes noises every few seconds. If you move any at all it airs up in that spot in order to keep from getting bedsores. The life of an invalid is a rather strange thing, but as my title sugests there are some good things. House Keeping comes every morning and mops my floor, gets the dirty towels, takes out the trash, AND cleans the toilet. I just sit here and grin, because even cooler than those things, is the fact that kitchen staff washes my dirty dishes. I have kissed orange & green anti-bacterial palm olive soap goodbye for awhile. Don't miss it a bit. And last but not least, my husband has also turned into a maid, ( not sure what the "man" term for maid is? ) but that's what the poor boy is. Now my next little ramble is absolutely funny to me, I have laughed most of the day over it, and I'm trying to remember if there are any men out there that read my "blog" if so, you may want to quit reading right here. So to the ladies: I realized 2 days ago that i was in desperate need of a stick of Burt's Bees ( chapstick ) and that I had almost ran out of ( pads ) & what's a girl to do when she is holed up & cannot go to Wal-Mart? So I sent Josh. After driving it into his brain the exact kind, style, shape, & size of this much needed item, I sent him on his way. Apparently, after a trip report from the man himself, it didn't go as smoothly as it could have. After doing a couple drive-by trips he figured out where the things were, & finally got the nerve to put some in the cart, after which he speedily went to the cereal aisle to pack boxes around them! ! ! This is where it gets the funniest. . . he decided to go to self-check out hoping no one would realize what he was purchasing, but the silly little things would not scan, and there was a line behind him, so he sent a look over to the girl standing there and of course she was watching him, ( I would have been ! ) and rescued him from his plight. I asked him just how many he had grabbed & he said " four, hoping I would never have to buy them again" He called me after the fact and he had barely survived the whole ordeal. He's pretty sure they need to improve bar codes on those things. I haven't laughed that hard in ages, I think these little girls thought I had completely lost it. The joys of being alive.

  On a more serious note, my mom spent most of the day here, chattering a mile a minute :) Then our neighbors stopped by and Daddy came up. . . & once again the girls had a good day.They have a new game they play & as all of you know, that have had a child in your belly, they think it is great fun to jam a foot behind the rib cage. Don't know why that is so much fun. I can't believe we're almost to hit the 2 week mark up here at the hospital. Thank-you to everyone who is thinking of us and praying, we will forever remember & appreciate it. Sweet Dreams to all and to all a Good Night.

Labor Day

   It seems strange that Labor Day has come & almost gone. Where does the time go? So far we've had another good day. . . I wonder if these little girls are playing a trick on me? :) I'm so thankful for every good day that we have with them. Yesterday & today in the sono, we were able to see their hair. I am a little terrified, due to the fact that it looked a little afro-ish. :) It is probably me dreaming, but you can never be too sure. We finally got to see "B's" face today, typically she does everything in her power to not let us see her, but now at least I know she has one:) She did the sono in 3-D again today, they are the strangest little pictures. . . but it makes it more real for some reason. They are just busy little bees in there, wouldn't it be weird if we could remember that? Not sure I would want to.

  Josh was able to spend the last two nights up here, so I was delighted. It's one sad situation when he leaves, though. Too bad I'm not pregnant with one and him the other, that way we'd both be stuck up here together :) I know I've told everyone & their pet dog this interesting little fact, but in the seahorse world, the male is preggo! Can you believe such a thing? I'm pretty sure that's the only species that roll that way, at least to my knowledge. Those creatures facinate me.

   Well I suppose I've droned on & on long enough for today. I will quit doing this and get back to my over-whelming decision of what to do next. Eat fruit gushers or read my kindle. Maybe even walk back & forth across this room a few hundred times. I could always go fill  up my water jug.

  Hope you all had a lovely Labor day weekend. The weather has been perfect. Yae fall! & pumpkins.  

Another Day Down in History

   Stembridge tells me every morning that we've made it another day, and we have. It was another good day, and we are truly thankful. The weather outside was lovely. If only I wasn't an in-mate :) The little ladies appeared to be happy as larks, so I won't complain about that. We had some visitors again today, which we LOVE. It makes our otherwise boring day interesting. Josh beat me at checkers, why oh why can't I ever win? Nothing to crazy or weird or strange happened, so I really don't have a lot to write about. For the first time in my life I want to go home and do some dishes. Does anyone else dislike them as much as I usually do? Adios for now. . . .

A Happy Day

   Today was a good day. . . after Josh got here we went to tour the NICU unit. It was truly amazing, once again we were reminded of just how great God is. I didn't think we'd get to see the babies, but we were able to see the whole set-up. Remember the mo-mo twins I mentioned? We actually seen them. One was 2 lbs. & the other was 2lbs. 5 oz., It was unbelievable. They were so perfect in their tiny little way, what got me was their ears, tiniest little things you ever saw in your life, and they were absolutely perfect. I'm not sure if I want to get a degree and work in NICU, or just go ahead and try to adopt all those little humans snuggled up in their little glass houses. If we take them home, we will need a bigger house. We live in a cracker-box:) But we love it. . . . All in all, it was one of the most memorable tours I will probably ever take. The staff is wonderful.

   Then we got a knock on the door, and my mom, who lives in Idaho showed up. I thought I was hallucinating. But it was her, she just decided to keep it a secret, and give me some heart palpitations. So that was the second fun thing. . . we had a lot of visitors today, it's nice to have the outside world come in.

 The girls have behaved really well all day, today they took after me, not their dad :) ! ! On a serious note, I hope they are just like their Dad. Everytime we put the monitors on my belly, "B" shoves her little butt up in the air like as if she's trying to get away, and "A" just hangs out like she's all cool, just chillin:) They are already hugely entertaining. . . Well it is now 9:30 and time for this 'ole' woman to go to bed. I hope you all are having a good long weekend <:~)

These Crazy Days Of Our Lives

  So I just got back up to my room ( home away from home ) about 2 hours ago. Last night after I fell asleep they informed me I was to go back down to Labor & Delivery to stay on the monitors all night. I didn't know if I should laugh or cry, so I did neither. Just went. They told me the babies looked like they were doing fine, it's a scream up here, you hear one thing and then another. You just smile & nod, cause there isn't a lot else you can do. I see Stembridge every morning, he's the Doc that will deliver these little mini girls. . . he's entertaining. He always tells me I do craZy things in order to get attention. Far from the truth.

  And. . . . the girls in "Sono" think I'm Russian. Isn't that the funniest thing ever? I hear it all the time up here. Pretty sure I was born and raised in the thriving metropolis of Galva. Not a whole lot goes on there.

  One more thing. . . for the benefit of those reading this that don't know what mo-mo twins are. . . they are from the same egg which decided to split later than eggs usually do. Which means only one sack has formed, so now there are two in one bag. There was a girl across the hall from me who just delivered a set of mo-mo's @ 27 weeks. She and the babies are doing fine. The nurse said that the umbilical cord was one huge gigantic knot . . . Silly late-splitting eggs.

So begins my "blog". Never did I think I would do such a New-Fangled thing, but then of course I never thought I'd be in the hospital, acting as a live incubator for two little mo-mo twins. We have been up here exactly a week now . . . some days good, others not so good. We have three monitoring sessions a day @ 8, 2, & 8. Breakfast comes @ 7ish. . . .always with cream of wheat. That is a new staple in my world of breakfast's. Then we monitor for an hour and then after awhile we go down to the weird hallway and do a sonogram.  Usually "B" has her butt on "A's" face & "A" is kicking "B" in the face. That is pretty much what they keep busy with day after day. By now I'm so used to hearing their heartbeats, I hear them in my sleep. It's funny to see two little girls in there that came from one teeny tiny egg, it never ceases to amaze me. God is truly wonderful. Who else could have come up with such a thing? Today the nurses thought "A" was decelling so we had to go down to Labor & Delivery. Let me tell anyone who is listening that those beds are deadly. Anyways they seemed to think the babies were doing fabulous, so back upstairs we went ( in a wheelchair ) heaven forbid I act like I'm 29 instead of 99. Thank goodness Josh was here for the ordeal. . . he happened to get off early and drive straight up here, so I was mighty happy about that. I never mind seeing daddy:) even though he is the water police. If he had his way I would wear a camel pack. Well I will sign off for today. . . it's been delightful talking to you :)